1.22 Mother of The Year

 

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~Sabrina’s P.O.V.~

Screenshot-389Two weeks after Justin came home, I was in the middle of making lunch for all of us, when my stomach grew tight and an intense pain traveled down my back. It took me by such surprise that I dropped the plate I was holding, and I doubled over. I called out to Justin, but the pain had passed before he got to the kitchen. I thought nothing of it, passing it off as a Braxton-Hicks, until another one took me by surprise 10 minutes later. Justin wheeled over to me, grabbing my shoulders as I breathed through the pain. I panted for a minute before burying my face in his shoulder, ”I think this is the real deal, Justin.”

He rubbed my back, “Okay, well you can’t drive in this condition, and I’m still stuck in this damn chair, so I’ll go call your mom while you put your feet up on the couch.”

I waddled to the couch, trying to keep the tears at bay. I was barely seven months pregnant, I couldn’t imagine losing the babies now. Justin came into the living room, “Your mom is leaving the house as we speak, so she should be here in 10 minutes or so. I was more than ready to leave when my mom came, having gone through another contraction on the couch.

Screenshot-393By the time we got there, two more contractions had worked their way through my body. It was my lucky day that Dr. Sinclair was working the delivery ward. He hooked me up to a CTG belt to monitor the babies’ heartrates and the intensity of my contractions. After three more contractions, he came back in and asked some questions, “Sabrina, you are 30 weeks along, correct?” I nodded through a contraction, and he continued, “Your contractions are 10 minutes apart, lasting a few seconds?”

“Yes, they’re between 10 and 12 minutes.”

He nodded, before saying, “The babies are trying to come out a little early, if you hadn’t guessed.  Since your water hasn’t broken, I’m ordering you on strict bedrest. I’ll give you something today to slow down your labor, but until the babies reach at least 36 weeks, I want you off your feet unless it’s for a bathroom break, or a sponge bath. Absolutely no stairs, or strenuous lifting, like a toddler.”

My lip quivered, “Are the babies okay?”

He smiled kindly, “Right now, they’re perfectly healthy. We want them to keep baking for a little bit longer.”

Screenshot-411I took a deep breath, trying to take it all in, but I was grateful to him. After he left, my mom moved her chair closer to my bed, “How are you feeling, sweetie?”

I nodded tiredly, exhaustion bringing tears to my eyes, “I’m trying not to stress out, but between Justin being out of work for who knows how long, and now this. I don’t know how we’ll pay for everything. We have his hospital bills and my hospital bills, and then there’s the housework and the boxes…I can’t put that all on Cassidy, and Justin is not strong enough yet…” my voice trailed off as I began sobbing.

My mom wrapped her arms around me, “Oh, sweet girl, it’ll be okay. I know this isn’t ideal, but you guys can do this, okay? Your father and I were going to surprise you once the twins are born, but now seems as good a time as ever.” I moved further away from her so I could see her face, and she continued, “When your father and I lost you, it was one of the darkest times in our life. Despite what the detectives told us, we knew you were out there somewhere, so we set up a trust fund for you. On your birthday every year, we would deposit 1000 dollars until you turned 18. It’s been about 5 years since we last checked your account but with interest rates, you should have well over 50,000 dollars.”

Screenshot-410.jpgI gasped, “Obviously, I’ll have to talk to Justin about it, but I can’t think of a reason that he’d turn it down. That’s very generous of you.” My mother nodded and I threw my arms around her, sobs of relief shaking us both. I pulled away and kissed her on the cheek. She rubbed my back as another contraction gripped my body. The medicine was beginning to work, the contraction over as quick as it started.  When she left to grab us some lunch from the cafeteria, I called Justin to tell him the news.

He answered on the first ring, “Hey, is everything okay?”

I nodded, “Yeah. I was going into premature labor, but they gave me some medicine to stop the contractions. I do have some bad news, though. I’ll be on bedrest for the next six weeks or so.”

He groaned sympathetically, “Aww, honey,  I’m sorry. I know you were hoping that we could avoid bedrest.”

We talked for a few more minutes, until my mom came back with lunch. I didn’t realize how hungry I was until the smell of mashed potatoes hit my nose. After dinner, my mom left, promising to come first thing in the morning to bring me home.

Screenshot-400Three days into the mandatory bedrest, and I was already going insane. Ethan and my father had moved Justin and I’s bed downstairs, so I wasn’t completely isolated, but I was going stir crazy. I had five and a half weeks left, and even then, I had to take it easy. Justin shuffled slowly over to the bed, “You have never looked more beautiful, Sabrina.” I froze, my spoonful of chocolate pudding dangling from my mouth, before rolling my eyes. He climbed into bed next to me, “No, I’m serious, you may not feel it, but you’re stunning. I can show you how I feel if it’ll convince you.” I set my bowl aside, giggling as he nuzzled my neck. He gently rolled on top of me, kissing me with a passion I hadn’t seen in a long time. Esther’s cry from her bedroom quickly shut down our little makeout session. I sighed and laid back while Justin went to go get her. Wondering when my life would feel “normal” again.

Screenshot-401Things were easygoing for the next month or so. Justin continued to get stronger, finally getting rid of his wheelchair while I remained in bed, missing out on all of Esther’s newest milestones. I’m embarrassed to say that I was growing quite irritable. Cassidy came down stairs in the middle of the night, waking up Justin and I, “Daddy, Mama, can I sleep with you? I had a bad dream.” Justin patted the space between us, while I moved over a little. Soon, you could hear her soft snores. I had just managed to fall back asleep when Esther’s cries could be heard down the hall. I groaned, and struggled to sit up, my ever-growing stomach making it near impossible. As I stood up, Justin waved me back into bed, “Sabrina, please lay down, you’re not supposed to walk, let alone carry Esther.” I growled in frustration, “I know that, Justin! I think after almost an entire month of laying down, I understand this! I just want to be able to go comfort my daughter.” I sat back down in a huff, while Justin went to go get Esther. I heard Cassidy toss and turn a little before she asked, “Mama, is everything okay?” I snapped at her, “Go back to sleep!” Realizing I had just yelled at her, I also laid my head down, turning my back to my family and crying quietly into my pillow.

Screenshot-403In the morning, I woke and saw a card next to the bed.

I know you’re getting sick of being stuck at home. If you take the wheelchair outside, a surprise is in store. Don’t worry about us., I’m taking the girls to the park and then a movie, so the house is all yours for a few hours. We love you, grumpy and all…

Justin

I grabbed my slippers, and sat in the wheelchair. Rolling onto the patio, I saw that Justin had set up a cushioned picnic area just for me. It had a stack of books, lots of food, and it was right next to the pool. I settled myself down among the massive pillows, trying to get comfortable. I picked one of the books up, grabbed a handful of grapes, and slowly began to relax.

Screenshot-404.jpgThe day passed by quickly, and by the time Justin and the kids got home, I was deep into an FBI thriller. The girls swarmed me with hugs and kisses, nearly tackling me. I laughed at their excitement, “Careful, don’t knock me over. How was the movie?”

Esther held my face in both her little hands, “Fish are friends, not food.” I snorted with laughter, waiting for Cassidy to explain.

I tickled them both until their faces turned red, before asking Cassidy, “What about, babydoll, did you like the movie?”

She nodded, seeming to be very cautious of what she says. I grabbed her hand and placed it on my belly before saying, “Sweetheart, I am so proud of you, Cass. I know I haven’t been the nicest mommy lately, and I’m sorry if I’ve been angry these last couple days.”

She placed a kiss on my stomach, “It’s okay, Mama. Daddy says growing babies is hard work.”

I laughed and snuggled her close, “That’s right, but that’s no excuse for being cranky. C’mon, let’s see if these babies will put on a show for us today, okay? I pulled up my shirt and poked at my belly, Soon enough, one them kicked real hard. I was stretched thin enough that you could see all their movements nowadays. It was more fun for me to watch Cassidy’s face as she felt them move and tried to figure out if was an arm, or a leg, and a butt or a head.

Screenshot-409.jpgJustin joined me on the blanket after a while, kissing my belly. I laid my head on his shoulder, “I’m sorry, baby. I shouldn’t have yelled at you this morning.

He kissed my forehead as we watched the sunset, “You have nothing to apologize for, honey. We will get through this together.”

As Cassidy led Esther around the yard, I turned to Justin and whispered, “I’m so sick of being pregnant, Justin. My body cannot possibly stretch anymore, and I’m so tired all the time, but I do nothing all day! I just want these babies out of me.” I clutched his shirt and sobbed quietly, so as not to alert the girls. He held me tight until my tears subsided. He kissed my cheek, “Feel better?” I nodded quietly, letting him rub my back.

He placed a kiss on my temple, “Have I thanked you lately?”

I looked at him quizzically, “Thanked me…for what? I’m a beached whale taking up space in our living room.”

He laughed, “No, seriously, Sabrina. You’re doing the most amazing job ever. You get to grow not one but two human beings inside of you. And this job you’re doing, is almost done, and then we’ll have two beautiful babies to look after.”

I laid my head on his chest, and sighed deeply, “Have we decided on names?”

The rest of the weekend flew by. The girls made a fort around my bed and we watched movies in it all day long. I tried to relax and enjoy the time I had with the girls before life grew even crazier.

1.21 Hormones, Hormones, Everywhere

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~Sabrina’s P.O.V~

Hey y’all, this chapter is shorter than the others, but I’ll be posting the next chapter in the next few days, so hopefully that makes up for it! ❤

Screenshot-395Trying to sleep in the hospital is nearly impossible. I had nurses check on me all throughout the night, checking my blood pressure, taking my temperature, and changing my iv. When morning finally came, I gave up on trying to get comfortable, so I shuffled down the hall to see Justin. I sat down with a heavy sigh, “I’m sorry for pressuring you, hon. I know you’re going to need time to recover. I shouldn’t have been so upset.” I kissed his forehead, gasping softly when his eyes fluttered open. He blinked, obviously very confused, and groaned, “Sabrina?”

Tears ran down my face as I nodded, “Yeah, it’s me baby.”

“Where am I? What happened?”

I moved closer to him and began to rub his forehead, “You were shot, twice, at our wedding three months ago.”

He grunted, “Are you ok?”

I kissed him, “I’m perfectly fine, Justin. You focus on getting your strength back, alright?”

I stood up, straightening the end of his bed. I glanced over at him, his eyes as big as saucers, and he stuttered, “Are…are you…pr-pregnant?”

I put a protective hand over my middle, “Yes. I’m about 5 months along……with twins.”

His smile stretched from ear to ear, and I nodded, “Cassidy is really excited, she really wants to help decorate the nursery. Cassidy! I have to go call my mom and have her bring the girls down here.”

Screenshot-396My mom promised to bring the girls as soon as they had finished breakfast. An hour later, Cassidy ran over to Justin, tears running down both of their faces. She clung to him for several minutes, both quietly sobbing. I knelt next to Cassidy, one hand on her back, one hand clutching Justin’s. She quieted a little, sobs still shaking her frame, “I thought I was going to lose you, Daddy.”

He grinned through his tears, “No way are you getting rid of me that easily, sweetheart.” He groaned as he lifted his arm up and stroked her hair. I pulled the chair closer to his bed, pulling Cassidy into my lap. We filled him in on everything he’d missed while he laid there and listened to us After an hour or so, I could tell he was fading. I held his hand, “Get some rest, honey. We’ll be back later tonight, okay?” He nodded weakly. Cassidy threw her arms around him, kissing his cheek. I did the same and took her by the hand.

We went down the hall, into my room. I laid on my bed, letting Cassidy feel the babies kick. She sat down on the bed next to me, “Will Daddy get to come home today, too?”

Screenshot-397.jpgI laughed as the babies kicked really big, “I don’t think so hon. Daddy has to build up his strength. His muscles are weak from not moving in a while. Don’t fret though, because I am busting out of here today.”

She leaned forward, laying her head onto my belly, “I can’t wait for the babies to be here.”

I nodded, whispering softly, “Me too.”

Once I was cleared to leave the hospital, we went upstairs to say goodbye to Justin. As I kissed him goodbye, he whispered, “Baby, I know that you’re going to want to visit every day, but I know how busy you must be, being a single mom right now, okay? Visit me when you can, but don’t feel like you have to be here every day.”

I put my forehead up against his, “For three months, I’ve waited for you to wake up. There is nothing that I need to do that is more important than you. I want to visit you while I can, in case I get put on bedrest.”

Screenshot-394A little less than a month later, we got to bring Justin home. Cassidy opened the front door while I pushed Justin inside. He was growing stronger every day, but he still had a long road ahead of him. As he settled in on the couch in the living room, I sat down and put my feet in his lap, “Okay, Cassidy it’s your turn to choose the movie and I’m putting you on popcorn duty. Esther, go get a blanket for Mommy and Daddy, please.” I turned to Justin, “As for you, sweet husband of mine, you’re on foot rub duty.”

He wiggled his eyebrows mischievously, “But Sabrina, my hands aren’t strong enough yet.”

I wiggled my toes, “Nice try, mister, but you’re going to build your strength back somehow.”

Cassidy came back, and before I knew it, the movie had started. Esther curled up in my lap, sort of. It was getting harder to hold her now that the babies were growing. I must’ve dozed off, because the next thing I knew, the movie was over, Cassidy had gone upstairs to bed and Esther was fast asleep on my chest. I stretched and tried to get up without waking her up, but it was pointless, I could barely get up on my own these days, let alone carry a toddler up the stairs. I caught Justin’s gaze and noticed his smirk. I playfully threw a pillow at his head before I made a blanket nest on the floor for Esther. Once she was all settled, I leaned against Justin, “I’d offer to carry you up the stairs babe, but uh I don’t think that’s an option right now.” He laughed, “Help me fold the couch into a bed, and we’ll call it good enough for now, okay?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1.20 Still Hanging In There

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~Sabrina’s P.O.V~

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I sat next Justin’s bed, my hand resting on his, “Hey, baby. It’s been a long week for us. Esther is getting her molars, so she’s been extra cranky. Cassidy had a Father-Daughter dance at school. Ethan took her, but I could tell she was very upset that you couldn’t join us. We really miss you around here, buddy. If you wanted to wake up for us now, any time, we’re more than ready to have you join us again. Justin, we’re about to be parents to two beautiful babies. I don’t know what I’m going to do once they arrive. My mom offered to come stay with us for the first few weeks and I’m thinking about taking her up on it. I wish I could come and sit with you more often, but between the girls and work, I end up going home and going straight to bed.” I cleared my throat as my tears threatened to surface, “Okay, well, let’s keep up with where we left off in The Odyssey, alright?” We read through a few chapter, but when my eyes started to droop, I kissed Justin goodnight.

As I waddled towards the exit, I swung by Dr. Sinclair’s office. His face brightened and he beamed at my growing waistline, “Pregnancy suits you, Sabrina.” I smiled my thanks, Dr. Sinclair and I had grown close over the last three months. He was the kind grandfather I had never experienced growing up. I sat back, putting my feet up for the first time in days, “So any progress this week?” He shrugged before stroking his mustache, “Some progress. There is still signs of brain activity, and he did squeeze the physical therapist’s hand on command. He’s in there, Sabrina. He just needs to heal before he wakes up.” I set my cup down gently, “In my head, I know this, but my heart just wants to shake him until he’s awake. I can’t have him miss the birth of our babies. I’m going to need him there.” Dr. Sinclair nodded his sympathies, but I knew there wasn’t much else he could do. I set my cup down, gave him an appreciative smile, and headed toward the door.

Screenshot-381I left the hospital, swinging by the store and finishing the rest of my errands. After picking up Esther from my parents’ house, we went home so I could start on dinner. I heard the school bus pull up as I was in the middle of prepping the pasta. Cassidy raced in, “Look at what we did for art class today! I’m going to give it to Daddy tomorrow. I smiled, “That’s great, Cass. Do you have any homework for this weekend?” She dug through her backpack, “Yes, I have to read another chapter, finish this math page and write a story on someone who I want to be when I’m older.” I set my spoon down, trying to focus on what she was saying, “Okay, who do you think you’ll write about?” she chatted on and on for a few minutes, but I tuned her out as I focused on steadying myself. The room had suddenly begun to sway. Cassidy stopped talking and looked at me, “Mom, are you alright?” I was about to nod when the room went black.

When I woke up, I was being loaded into the back of an ambulance. I heard Cassidy’s frantic cries, and I begged the EMT to let her through. She rushed to my side, tears pouring down her face, “Mama, will you be alright?” I nodded weakly, my head pounding, “Yes, baby, I have to go to the hospital to make sure the babies are okay. Bring me my phone, babydoll, and I’ll call Grandma to have her bring you to the hospital for me, okay?” While she scampered off, one of the EMT’s brought Esther over to see me. I gave her a kiss as she reached for me. When Cassidy returned, I managed to get ahold of my mother, who was fortunately five minutes away, and she promised to rush over. Since I was awake and talking, the paramedics agreed to wait for her to arrive.

Screenshot-382It wasn’t long until I was on my way to the hospital, where I was sent straight into the radiology floor to do an emergency ultrasound. As I waited in a recovery room for the results, my mother brought the girls in to see me. Esther curled up against my side and fell asleep. Cassidy, on the other hand, didn’t take her eyes off me. I held her hand, ‘Honey, I’m going to be okay, I’m sorry that you had to see that, but I promise that I’m okay. The doctor will be in soon to tell us what happened.” She nodded her head solemnly so I patted the other side of me. She climbed up, putting a hand on my belly, and laying her head on my shoulder. I kissed her forehead, wishing I could promise a happy ending, but on the inside, I was preparing for the worst.

Dr. Sinclair poked his head in the doorway, “I heard someone was trying to compete for attention, you rascals,” He came close to the edge of my bed, and pulled out my ultrasound results. He looked over at the girls, but I nodded and assured him that they could be here. He quirked his eyebrow at me, “Have you been drinking enough water, Sabrina?” I dipped my head slightly, “Probably not.” He shook his head half-jokingly at me, “That explains the fainting spell earlier. All in all, the babies look good. I’ll keep you over night to rehydrate you, and we’ll release you tomorrow. If this happens again though, I’m ordering you on bedrest for the next three months.” I nodded obediently before asking, “Am I on bedrest while I’m here?” He chuckled, “No, but where you go, so will your iv.”

Screenshot-385After my mom took the girls home, I headed down the hall towards Justin’s room. As I sat inside, I whispered to him, “Hey, baby, I know I’m here twice today, but this was not a planned trip. I didn’t drink enough water, today, or yesterday for that matter. I get to have a sleepover with you, buddy,” my voice caught in my throat as I began to sob quietly. I stood up and paced beside his bed, “Baby, I need you to wake up for me. I’m scared to do this alone. I wake up in that big, empty bed of ours and I’m afraid that I’ll never get to hear your laugh again, or see your eyes light up when you talk to our girls. How am I going to live without you? I am trying so hard to be a mom to our girls, but I constantly feel like I’m failing someone.” I began sobbing once more, taking his hand in mine, “Justin, please, please, wake up.”  I watched him for a sign of any movement, but nothing happened. Feeling discouraged, I walked back to my room, rolling over onto my side and silently crying into my pillow.